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[news] Injured dog's selflessness draws tears
Posted by bmoremastini on 22 Dec : 08:10
what an amazing story! thanks for shari [more ...]

[news] Gene Causes Canine Compulsive Disorder in Suspectable Dog Breeds
Posted by maximus on 21 Apr : 14:17
this is a test comment for Jessica

[links_page] Molosser Dogs
Posted by maximus on 20 Jan : 16:12
I just had to put a comment on this one. [more ...]

[news] Unwanted Canine Guests: Internal Parasites
Posted by basaltcanyon on 31 May : 13:10
Not sure why the link doesn't work but c [more ...]

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megladon

Thu Jun 04 2009, 09:47PM

Registered Member #93

Joined: Tue Sep 09 2008, 09:52PM
Location: mackay queensland
Posts: 567
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An Irish woman of advanced age visited her
physician to ask his advice in reviving her husband's
libido.

'What about trying Viagra?' asked the
doctor?

'Not a chance', she said. 'He
won't even take an aspirin..'

'Not a problem,' replied the doctor.
'Give him an 'Irish Viagra'.

It's when you drop the Viagra tablet into
his coffee, he won't even taste it.

Give it a try and call me in a week to let me
know how things went.'

A week later when she called the doctor, who
directly inquired as to her progress.

The poor dear exclaimed, 'Oh, faith,
bejaysus and begorrah!

T'was horrid!... Just terrible,
doctor!'

'Really? ......What happened?' asked
the doctor.

'Well, I did as you advised and slipped it
in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate.

He jumped straight up, with a twinkle in his
eye and with his pants a-bulging fiercely!

With one swoop of his arm, he sent me cups and
tablecloth flying, ripped me clothes to tatters
and took me then and there passionately on the
tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute
nightmare!'

'Why so terrible?' asked the doctor,
'Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn't
good?'

'Feckin jaysus, 'twas the best sex
I've had in 25 years!

But sure as I'm sittin here, I'll never
be able to show me face in 'McDonalds' again!

[ Edited Wed Apr 07 2010, 07:36PM ]

thundermug

Thu Jun 04 2009, 10:54PM

Registered Member #44

Joined: Mon Jun 30 2008, 07:06PM
Location: aLABAMA
Posts: 89
Thanked 5 time in 3 post

Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden..............Adam says" You better get back Eve I don't know how big this things gonna get.

MastinoCharina

Fri Jun 05 2009, 07:33AM

CORRADO

Registered Member #10

Joined: Sat Jun 21 2008, 04:26PM
Location: Zionsville, IN
Posts: 319
Thanked 11 time in 11 post

HA HA

megladon

Fri Jun 05 2009, 08:34AM

Registered Member #93

Joined: Tue Sep 09 2008, 09:52PM
Location: mackay queensland
Posts: 567
Thanked 16 time in 16 post

A man and a woman who had never met before found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a trans-continental train. They tried to make other arrangements, but the train was full and they were both very tired. They agreed to make the best of it for at least one night. There were two berths, and the man gallantly agreed to take the upper one.

At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you please reach into that closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."

"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married."

"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.

"Good," she said. "Get your own f...... blanket."

megladon

Fri Jun 05 2009, 08:36AM

Registered Member #93

Joined: Tue Sep 09 2008, 09:52PM
Location: mackay queensland
Posts: 567
Thanked 16 time in 16 post

She was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only the T-shirt she normally slept in. As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said softly, 'You've got to make love to me this very moment!' My eyes lit up and I thought, 'I am either still dreaming or this is going to be my lucky day!' Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then gave it my all right there on the kitchen table. Afterwards she said, 'Thanks,' and returned to the stove, her T-shirt still around her neck.

Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked, 'What was that all about?' She explained, 'The egg timer's broken.'

jessica

Fri Jun 05 2009, 01:26PM

Registered Member #9

Joined: Fri Jun 20 2008, 02:11PM
Location: Oakland County
Posts: 1578
Thanked 57 time in 55 post

Buddy and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year, And every year Buddy would say, 'Edna,I'd like to ride in that helicopter' Edna always replied, 'I know Buddy, but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, And fifty bucks is fifty bucks' One year Buddy and Edna went to the fair, and Buddy said, 'Edna, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance' To this, Edna replied, "Buddy that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks' The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don't say a word I won't charge you a penny! But if you say one word it's fifty dollars.' Buddy and Edna agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, But still not a word... When they landed, the pilot turned to Buddy and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!' Buddy replied, 'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Edna fell out, But you know, "Fifty bucks is fifty bucks!'
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jessica

Tue Jun 09 2009, 03:16PM

Registered Member #9

Joined: Fri Jun 20 2008, 02:11PM
Location: Oakland County
Posts: 1578
Thanked 57 time in 55 post

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

And last, but not least:

14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

jessica

Mon Jun 15 2009, 03:30PM

Registered Member #9

Joined: Fri Jun 20 2008, 02:11PM
Location: Oakland County
Posts: 1578
Thanked 57 time in 55 post

How Can you tell if it's a guy from Michigan?
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doc

Mon Jun 15 2009, 03:37PM

Registered Member #110

Joined: Thu Oct 09 2008, 08:48AM
Location: San Celmente Ca
Posts: 145
Thanked 4 time in 4 post

jessica wrote ...

How Can you tell if it's a guy from Michigan?
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Hey he has to do what he has to do! nice doe!

[ Edited Mon Jun 15 2009, 03:37PM ]

jessica

Mon Jun 15 2009, 03:39PM

Registered Member #9

Joined: Fri Jun 20 2008, 02:11PM
Location: Oakland County
Posts: 1578
Thanked 57 time in 55 post

MOTHER SAVING HER CHILD

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Look at the dog's face ...He has to be thinking

"I just got my @ss kicked by a squirrel"

doc

Mon Jun 15 2009, 04:07PM

Registered Member #110

Joined: Thu Oct 09 2008, 08:48AM
Location: San Celmente Ca
Posts: 145
Thanked 4 time in 4 post

dude I hate Squirrels I wish he would have ate both of them fucking rats with a bushy tail!

megladon

Mon Jun 15 2009, 07:56PM

Registered Member #93

Joined: Tue Sep 09 2008, 09:52PM
Location: mackay queensland
Posts: 567
Thanked 16 time in 16 post

I like the red ones

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